Monday, September 27, 2010

4 Things I Want To List

You guys are so lucky today a wave of sickness has knocked me out of commission and finally slowed me down enough that I can sit at the computer for more than three seconds so that I might post something.  I don't have the energy to post a full blown segment of 4 things, but I think that this might tide you over until that time.

4 things that I am excited about right now:
  1. I finally got an iphone 4, which makes me feel very sophisticated and important.  I imagine that when people see me on it, they think that I am talking to important clients, or arranging meetings.  The sad reality is that I'm probably ordering General Tso's Chicken from Yank Sing for pick-up, but they don't know that do they?  Though it is helping me to reach my goals of being a more proficient and amazing individual.  There are all kinds of note taking, and scheduling apps to keep up with my life.  But there's also a game where you get to fling birds at pigs so as you can imagine that's exactly what I've been doing.
  2. I finally booked my flight to Cleveland for this November.  I didn't think I'd end up actually doing it, but I am so excited about it.  I imagine that I'll spend my time there eating at less than hygienic twenty four hour diners, seeing the first installment of the new Harry Potter movie, and laughing so much that I'll lose my voice, or start doing that really annoying squealing thing that I am prone to do. I know this next part is going to sound very juvenile for a twenty four year old but I have never gone anywhere without my family and that thought is exhilarating, the freedom.  I cannot stop thinking about it.
  3. My news writing class is so great, I really love it.  I'll admit that before I actually started to get into my journalism classes I wondered if it was for me.  Most of my fears have subsided now, mostly because I'm enjoying it so much.  I feel like I'm learning so much, not just about the craft itself but about the world around me.  So far I've interviewed a nurse, a student who has started her own charity, a child psychologist, and a firefighter.  I know that makes me sound like I'm writing essays for a middle school career fair, but still.  I am really enjoying learning about things that I previously had no aptitude or interest in whatsoever.  
  4. The last thing I'm excited about is really just everything else that hasn't already been mentioned.  Do you get that feeling when even though you have no reason to believe that things are about to be amazing you just know they are?  I've been feeling like that for a while now.  Usually I'm a terrible Debbie Downer, but right now I just feel so optimistic.  I feel so hopeful, and sure of everything.  I just know that things are going to be amazing, without much effort on my part.  Things will fall into place.  I'm sure of it.
4 things I love right now:
  1. Little Lies by Dave Barnes
  2. These shirts from American Eagle which fit in perfectly with my closet full of plain colored t shirts.  These make me feel a little less like a giant cotton covered wall of fat.
  3. This iphone case I found on Etsy, which I would order because it looks amazing, but it is totally impractical to put a four hundred dollar phone in a cotton sleeve. 
  4. Einstein's Brother's Honey Whole Wheat Bagels, which I eat nearly every Tuesday and Thursday morning during my break between classes.

Thursday, September 02, 2010

I'm so mono begging to be stereo

Today I was told by my journalism professor that to be a journalist one has to be aggressive.  To be a successful writer one must be balls out and take no prisoners and be cut throat, and all of those other adjectives to describe a complete asshole.  I immediately was terrified because I may be the least aggressive person in the entire world.  Although naturally curious by nature I am not the one to go out of my way to talk to new people.  In fact I'm more inclined to do the opposite and stand int he corner and observe until someone deigns to speak to me first.  I never want to interrupt, or speak out of place, or be presumptuous.  It's just not in my nature.  I don't want to step on any metaphorical toes. 

It got me thinking that maybe I'm doing it all wrong.  Maybe it's not enough to just love something, or to have a mild amount of talent for it.  Temperament is important, drive is important, maybe I don't have enough of either of those qualities.  Maybe there is some job out there that I'd be more suited for. 

I've never tried pottery.  What if the first time my hands touched clay I made the world's best clay pot?  What if I am a pottery prodigy and never knew it?  I could be the worlds best clay pot maker;  and how will I know whether or not I am if I've never tried?  How will I try all of the things out there before I decide what it is that is meant for me.  Is there anything out there that is meant for me? 

What if I can't be aggressive, or what if I have no place in a newsroom?  What if I look horrible in business attire?    What if no one wants to come to lunch with me?  Will I be expected to buy an iPad?  What if I can't reach deadlines?  What if I don't measure up? I am terrified that I will be the worlds worst journalist.  Will I graduate with a degree in Journalism only to be made to write up obituaries for the rest of my life?  Will I someday have to take a job as editor of the Thrifty Nickel?  What if I am the world's worst journalist?  Do they offer some opposite of the Pulitzer prize, some Razzie of the newspaper world?  Will they create the award just for me so that everyone knows that I am the worst writer to ever grace the crinkled first page of some small local daily? 

I feel like it's already started and I am no where near graduation.   I've been assigned to write one article a week.  Find a story, find an interview, write it up.  I'm already nervous.  I've already begun to spin.   I know that I am spinning because that is what I do.  I spin out of control so fast that almost no one can keep up with the bouts of crazy radiating off of me.  Has anyone as ridiculous as me ever gone on to be successful in this field?  Do you have their number?