Thursday, February 28, 2008

Stop it, right now please

If one more fucking person finds this site by searching for "Beyonce Pussy" I swear to God, I'm going to cut someone. And I know that this post only will increase the incidences of this happening, still that shit needs to be put out there.

On Being Okay

Today I realized that I might actually have a real relationship with my father. Not one of those typical Louisianian father/son relationships where we scratch ourselves and shoot wild animals. But maybe one where two people can talk about things, real things. Maybe something more like friendship I think he might even actually trust me with his secrets. And it feels okay. It makes me realize that maybe you're friends aren't the ones you pick for yourself, but maybe just maybe can be the ones you were born with. And in my unstable life where I never really know who I am, or who my friends are from day to day I know that maybe I have someone to count on anyways. And that's okay.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

NEW HEADER NEW HEADER NEW HEADER

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE MY NEW HEADER? BECAUSE I AM IN LOVE WITH MY NEW HEADER! WHAT? YOU DON'T LIKE MY NEW HEADER? THEN FUCK OFF.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Extra! Extra!

I haven't written much this week, I guess there's just not that much to say. But I am writing right now to tell you that very soon something pretty cool, that I'm excited about will be happening here. So stay tuned for that.


Did i really just make a post plugging my own site? That is so self promoting of me, can you even handle it?

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Fuck a Valentine

Originally I was going to post a list of the "Hot Shit of the Month" for February including a list of things to get your Valentine's holiday going. But instead I'm going to bitch and moan for a while, if you don't mind. And if you do mind, get the fuck off of my site.

So anyways, I was just watching the local news and as a special Valentine's report they were talking about love and such. They were stating some inane facts and during they said "it has been scientifically proven that those in a loving relationship, have better heart health and tend to live longer lives"

This is such fucking bullshit. You know as if there wasn't enough fucking pressure in this world for people to mate for life, now they're telling us that if we don't settle down our arteries will clog, and we'll die and finally end our loveless exsistences? Well, I won't stand for all of this propoganda. You know I used to think it was just middle aged women who felt all of this pressure to settle down and get married. But now I realize, it's everywhere, and everyone is affected by it. Biological clock, or not its as if the world is telling us that if we don't get hitched soon we might as well count ourselves out because single people DON'T MATTER.

Is it really true that you're nobody untill somebody loves you? And if that is true, what if no one ever does? What if we go our entire lives without finding true love like my aunt Peggy, and just live by ourselves and live horrible, lonely lives? Is that so bad? I mean, I'm not sure it's what I want. But really, are we really incomplete if we don't fit into this standard that the world is telling us is right? I am so enraged (sadly, not engaged) right now. It makes me sick. It really does.

And if you can't relate to any of this because you are in a relationship, well then you can suck it.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

REBAPALOOZA 2008

As some of you might already know last week I attended the Bossier City date of the "Two Worlds, Two Voices Tour" featuring Reba Mcentire and Kelly Clarkson. This was my fourth time seeing Reba, and my first for Kelly. It was an amazing show, Reba always puts on a great show though, so it's to be expected.

The first time I saw her was when I was six months old, and although I don't remember it my love for her was fostered then I believe. I saw her again when I was about seven or eight when my parents surprised me with tickets on the day of the concert. I last saw her in Houston with my sister (who is now a bigger fan than I am.) It was good, but we were super far away, and Reba was wearing some bad pink pants. I hated those pants, and I'm pretty sure the general concensous after the concert was "She has an amazing voice, but what the fuck was up with those pants?" Or at least thats how it seemed to me. But this time we were pretty close, and it was just simply amazing. I'm still a little speechless. Reba has always been such a huge icon to me. I've always looked up to her. She's just a normal woman, who did amazing things. No drama, no ordeals, just a lot of talent and drive. Thats a big deal for me. But enough with my memories and inane musings. Let's get down to the dirty. Here are a lot of pictures I'm not labeling them, no further information for you. Just the pictures.
Thank you and good night.











Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Correspondence

To: you know who you are,

If you ever needed a friend who was there too much, I should be your first pick. If you ever needed a friend who is going to support your choices no matter how asinine they may be you should give me a call. If you ever need a friend to go along with your crazy schemes you should put me in your daily planner. If you ever needed someone to be a spring board for all your crazy dreams, and wishes you can jump on me.

But if you ever needed a door mat, I'm there for that too I guess. If you ever needed someone to stand by your side through whatever only to betray me ten years later then I guess I'm the kind of person you could do that to also. If material possessions are more important to you then loyalty and friendship, then keep me in mind. Because apparently I'm your man. I'm the one you can walk for miles with and wax poetically about your horrible lot in life with. I would listen and I think you know that. But apparently these things are not enough for you. Well, I hope it's all worth it in the end.

I hope you don't find yourself all alone. I really don't. Because even though I know you didn't make the choice for yourself, you didn't do anything to stop it either. You didn't do anything to stand up for your friend of ten years. You just sat there and took it. You just let them deny you people who are only there to support your choices, and your happiness. But you let them take that away from you. And for that I am sorry. I am sorry that you can't think for yourself apparently. I'm sorry that you don't have it in you to stand up and fight for who you believe in. I'm sorry, and I really hope that those four walls are worth all the trouble. I hope that kitchen counter listens to you in the middle of the night when you think things just can't get any worse. And I hope that bookshelf says comforting things to you about your past. I hope it does. Because I guess you know that I never will again.

Yours,
Signed Jordan

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Learning Curve

Tonight I learned that it's okay to sometimes be blunt, maybe some times even too honest. I learned that it's okay to try to protect the ones you love from ever getting hurt. Sometimes its even okay to be shielded from the darker things. Especially if someone you love understands this too.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Tonight

Tonight, I'm giving uup the ghost.

No further information needed.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

No fucking way.

So we got this new computer a few weeks ago right? Well my dad decided that he was going to fucking put parental controls on my fucking screen name. I can't even see my own fucking website. What the fuck?

Stop the fucking madness.

I will find a way out of this.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Did You Know?

Did you know that you can blog from Microsoft Office Vista? I didn't! Fuck right.

Beyonce Is Still Slinging That Pussy For Money

I would just like to say to whomever it was that searched on google for "Beyonce Fried Chicken" and found my site, that I think we need to discuss.

Also, I just recently found out that my site is the first thing that comes up when one searches for "Beyonce Fried Chicken" on Google. I think my work here is done.