Friday, January 11, 2008

The Missing Piece

I lived my childhood like every hairbrush, and remote control was a microphone. Like every flat surface was a stage hoping that one day I too would be under the bright lights and heavy stares.

I lived my teenage years like energy was going out of style. I was always the loudest, and the most excited. Like every day was a new possibility and hoping that one day that someone would see me for who I really was and not just their preconcieved notions of me.

Now, I live my life like I'm afraid of something, like I'm afraid of everything. Like any minute life as I know it will change again. Like any minute now something horrible is going to befall me, and I won't know how to handle it. I don't have the dreams I once had, and I don't have the energy I once possessed. Sometimes I feel like I'm only half of my former self. LIke I'm the circle in "The Missing Piece" (by Shel Silverstein) Like I'm rolling around life without a purpose or a meaning, just searching for that part of my life that I'm not sure how I lost, or if I'll ever find again, just hoping that someday I will.

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