Thursday, March 06, 2008

The Post Where I Use the Word "Fuck" Three Times

I hate the term "constructive criticism" because there is absolutely nothing 'constructive' about it. It doesn't help me in the slightest when you pick out all of my insecurities and lay them out in front of me. It doesn't change things for me, it just makes things worse. If you know me at all, you probably understand that I have large self esteem issues that I cover up with false increased self worth. I pretend that I'm the hottest being to ever walk the planet because I know I'm not. I act like the smartest individual in the room because deep down I know I'm probably the stupidest. I fake being the most talented, and the most creative, and funniest, because I know I'm not. There will always be someone funnier, or better looking, or smarter than I am. I will always be in last place, and I get that. I'm not trying to win any races, but you pointing all of these things out for me doesn't help. I'm really not trying to be down on myself, these are just things that I've come to accept. But you should have enough tact to not bring them up. you should have enough tact to remember that every time you make a fat joke at my expense I drown my sorrows in a hostess cupcake.

You know I typed that about an hour ago, and now I'm totally over it. Now I'm just being impatient that my illegal copy of the High School Musical 2 Soundtrack is taking so fucking long to download. Don't the people at Azureus realize that I lead a busy life? I bought a copy of "101 Dalmatians" today that is begging to be viewed.

So I guess what I'm saying is that if you don't like the way I am, you can fuck the fuck off, mother fucker.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

You said fuck more than three times, and I was very disappointed.

Jordan said...

See, this is why you're the copy editor and I am not.

Because I TOTALLY ignored that first "fuck"

Estelle said...

I love this post.
I seriously think I am developing a blogger crush on you. lol

Jordan said...

I've had people develop crushes on me over less. So keep it in your pants firefly, Postarita is a family place.

Oh, and thanks for reading hookerface.

Estelle said...

A family place?
Oh, I forgot. It takes 5 uses of the word "fuck" to deem a site unfit for the fragile minds of today's youth.
lol

Jordan said...

See Firefly you're practicall IN THE KNOW. Only that I think it takes five uses of the word fuck, and at least one mention of the almighty vag-jay-jay to be considered offensive to children and small pets.

Anonymous said...

your face is offensive to children and small pets.

Jordan said...

And you are just offensive to me, so fuck off.